The Angry Guy at a Rageaholics Meeting

“Hello, and welcome to rageaholics anonymous. My name is Daniel.”

“FUCK!” screamed Dick.

Daniel looked at him like an angry gorilla looks at another angry gorilla: with anger.

“Dick, what did we say about yelling? Am I going to have to come down off of this podium and show you what for?”

Dick leaped from his chair chest-first, like an enraged ballerina. When his feet hit the ground, he assumed an offensive stance.

“YOU DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO, DAN.” he shouted.

Daniel front flipped off of the podium and in one smooth motion, grabbed Dick by the arm, and flipped him out the window. Dick fell 2 stories, breaking his leg and his pride.

Daniel spit on him from above.

“I’ve had it with your anger, Dick.” he roared, and he began to climb to the top of the church, preparing for his final attack. Knowing what was to come, Dick began pleading for mercy as Daniel continued to climb.

“NO DAN, PLEASE! NOT THE ELBOW OF THE HEAVENS!” cried Dick.

Daniel didn’t even turn; continuing to climb as he answered “YES DICK, THE ELBOW OF THE GODDAMN HEAVENS.”

After a minute, he reached the top of the bell tower and prepared his chakra. Dick tried limping away, but it was far too late for limping away, which was what he was trying to do. So in other words, it was ineffectual.

“THIS IS IT, DICK!” yelled Daniel. “ALL OF MY POWER WILL GO INTO THIS ONE ELBOW!”

And with that, he threw himself from the tower with such force that his body incinerated. He was now a being of pure resentment.

When his elbow made contact with Dick’s shoulder, it cleaved him in twain.

All of this happened at the first rageaholics anonymous meeting I went to. But no one will believe me because they say it’s impossible to jump off of buildings and cut people in half with solidified hatred.

It makes me so fucking mad.

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